Posts Tagged “silly”

Ever wondered about the appeal of TRUE BLOOD? The comedic talent at bablegum strikes again with this positively splendid send up of the show. (PS -- The video they did about the terrorist attack cancelled due to a Stephanie Meyer’s appearance is just….WTFery at it’s best!)

And now that I have your attention, I give you reason to snuggle up…and dance. ;) *ducks and runs*

Don’t forget to come visit me this afternoon between 4:00 and 5:00 EST. I’m hosting the LASR chat at their Yahoo Group (you can join and then unjoin--LOL). Marianne, Judy and Wendi are giving away lots of goodies like gift cards, books, LASR swag, and two Nooks. PLUS, I’ll be giving away a .pdf ARC of FAIRY TALES CAN COME TRUE and a special prize--the chance to help create and name a secondary character in FAERIE FOOL!

FYI, they are looking for reviewers--free books. Just sayin’…

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I forgot that I was going to post our Friday Flash story in it’s entirety. Oops. *blush* My brain has been elsewhere. Also, I forgot to mention yesterday that George Eads, my photographic model for Deke Carpenter in FAIRY TALES, was all but unanimously picked to move into the Mr. Summer finals.

So, without further adieu, here is our story:

And then she jumped me. She’d been the number one champion for the underdog, always taking up for those too scared or too timid to take up for themselves. Maybe that’s why he’d never allowed himself to fall completely in love.

“So you read about me.”

“Steady, Missy.” Strike had teleported with no training, no guidance. She doesn’t seem to be in any danger at the moment.

The Viking was bigger, stronger, and most intent on breaching the lady’s thighs. Eve was going to dig quickly to learn just how much Towers had tucked away. All she needed to do was open the sluice gates a little, and the quickest way to do that was with some good old-fashioned masturbation–or what her mother had called “naughty fingers” when Tess was growing up.

“Why can’t you just leave me alone?” she demanded.

A complaint to his supervisor resulted in nothing but a lecture about how she was clearly sending mixed signals. And the mystery woman made him want to thrust both hands directly into the black dirt. Once she flew to Seattle to visit with him over a long weekend and three times he flew to Phoenix, also for long weekend, visits that went spectacularly well.

“Why won’t you kill me?”

Still, she had a way of making the word man sound as if Jessie should, in a complete role reversal, demand her mother wash her mouth out with soap. She was no match for these men. They caught a quick bite at the deli near the hotel before hurriedly–and cautiously– grabbing their remaining belongings from their rooms and catching the 17:20 train to Aswan. The same could not be said for the man who stood staring through the floor-length windows overlooking the half-pipe in the warehouse beyond. Not that she could blame him.

Before this year, she’d fired that weapon only during her bureau training and never removed it from its holster once in the line of duty. He’s been with Luke a couple of years now and hasn’t had a single problem. Something about wanting her Faery back and you dead.

She’d been through this before. Now that we might have found him and had to go in guns blazing, I was thinking…maybe not so good. But Quigga just furrowed his brow as he looked up at the Golden Monkeys’ city. The impressive edifice had its own carbide gas generating plant in the basement, along with a coal-fired, steam radiator heating system. He’d probably thought he was leaving it behind him in Toronto, but the scandal rags of Halifax couldn’t resist sinking their teeth into a prime catch like Randall Barrett.

So try to calm down, get quiet, breathe, and listen. His strictest rule is not to get into trouble and not to give my mother a big mouth. Whereas Deliverance is about a stranger coming to the rescue, Sojourn is about a stranger coming to visit. Ours is a culture that tells us ‘bigger is always better’ and that ‘more’ is better too. I felt like I might break out in welts from sheer anxiety. The world within him, and the world as he sees it. It also made her feel like an imposter.

Although Dorothy turns back for the time being, powerful forces have been set in motion in her life. The psychological concept of the Shadow archetype is a useful metaphor for understanding villians and antagonists in our stories, as well as grasping the unexpressed, ignored, or deeply hidden aspects of our heroes. They didn’t smoke, or drink, or (if the movie Footloose was to be believed) dance. We point to well-intentioned social programs like battered women’s shelters and “dress-for-success” nonprofit organizations that help women get out from under abuse and wonder, why didn’t she seek

Cooper waited at the front door. The Fossah looked at Katook but was silent.

“I’m not!”

Monte Carson laid the three telegraph forms on his desk, his eyes fixed beyond the open door to the sheriff’s office in Big Rock, Colorado.

“I left Vinnie alone in my apartment for a few hours, and he was wearing my panties when I came home. Your arms were crossed over your chest, you had this terrifying scowl on your face… How many times you manage to fertilize an egg?”

Some days are decidedly less peaceful. Silvio Menzano was married in a private legal ceremony in Vermont in September 2009. Brighten up your garden with these colorful, hand-crafted stakes, an arresting combination of fiery, light-capturing glass and warm, smooth stone. To create a garden that emphasized symmetry and geometry, Webster began with a central water feature.

Even the best fall down sometimes. Guest blogger Shiloh Walker and Other Monsters Under the Bed. Reggie Jackson famously said “Blind men come to the park just to hear him pitch.” Welcome back Stephanie Newton.

She had never been more embarrassed, felt more rejected, not even when Wilson had left her at the altar. Someone poked her back and she whipped around startled. A slender, stylishly dressed blonde woman opened the door.

It was two hours until dawn, the bulk of my evening having been taken up by Ethan, Nick, and my father, so I took the opportunity to give the library the perusal of a former researcher. “Hello.”

“Good.”

Maybe she was crazy.

She could never focus on it, though; never place the memory. “It does not matter anyway, does it?” she said.

“No need to run little man,” one of the rogues taunted, his voice scrapping like gravel. It took time and effort to shape an effective medical team, and there would be a certain attrition rate. Oh, no, she didn’t want to fall asleep, as welcome as it might have been.

Today they will find her body. Or she has already left for work, but is running late. A.J. Sutherland was captivated by the stallion the first moment she saw him. Everyone else just took up space.

“As long as you’re with me, Lex, I can do anything.” Then he walked away. Nikita had sent them paper. For all eternity. “You, darling Sara, have captured me completely.”

“Hmm-hmm.”

It was good to know that, in at least one area of my life at least, my choices had been just fine.

“Oh my dear…” he laughed “…when we are together, the world will never, ever be the same.”

So is the hunter. I tucked the firearm into the holster under my left arm even as I rose from the chair to continue doing my job…

The End

Now all it needs is a title. Y’all have any ideas? Oh…Iffy says be sure to drop by tomorrow. She has chocolitinis to share as she interviews Deirdre O’Connor from FAERIE FIRE.

And to those of you lining up to kick my patootie about FOOL, I am writing. I know it doesn’t look like the graph is moving, but it is, slowly but surely, usually 1000 words at a time (which is only about 1% of the total in my goal) so don’t get upset if it doesn’t look like it’s moving. I promise it is!

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Put away all liquids. I hadn’t seen this one before. It is…WTF*ery at it’s best!

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…OR… Let’s procrastinate!?! I discovered this fun little time waster from a tweet by literary agent, Janet Reid. I think this is hysterical. First, I plugged in the first chapter of AGGIE AND THE ZOMBIES. After analysis, I was given this badge to post. (Oh, how I wish! Asimov has always been a writing hero of mine!!!)

I write like
Isaac Asimov

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Then, out of curiosity, I had to plug in the first chapter of SEASON OF THE WITCH. It came up that I write like Dan Brown. Wow. Do you suppose I could use this in a query to an agent or editor? ;) Yeah…probably not. LOLOL

So, folks, plug in examples of your own writing and share with us who you write like!

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I wish this was moving pictures, but it’s not. You’ll just have to follow the link and scroll. Trust me. It is worth the effort. I am still cleaning cafe au lait off my monitor. (And I find it rather fitting that somewhere in the world today, there is a total solar eclipse.)


LOLCat Repertory Players Strike Again
.

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Okey, dokey karaoke. The results are in. For awhile at least, we’ll do a Friday Flash Fiction feature here in the shadows. Each week, there will be a different page number and sentence. We’ll have some fun for the summer. In the meantime, y’all cracked me up about everyone wanting to use the line from FAERIE FATE. Thanks!

Before we get to the fun, disclaimer time. All sentences are copyrighted by their various authors. Authors names and book titles are attributed HERE. Now, without further ado, here’s our story:

And then she jumped me. She’d been the number one champion for the underdog, always taking up for those too scared or too timid to take up for themselves. Maybe that’s why he’d never allowed himself to fall completely in love.

“So you read about me.”

“Steady, Missy.” Strike had teleported with no training, no guidance. She doesn’t seem to be in any danger at the moment.

The Viking was bigger, stronger, and most intent on breaching the lady’s thighs. Eve was going to dig quickly to learn just how much Towers had tucked away. All she needed to do was open the sluice gates a little, and the quickest way to do that was with some good old-fashioned masturbation–or what her mother had called “naughty fingers” when Tess was growing up.

“Why can’t you just leave me alone?” she demanded.

A complaint to his supervisor resulted in nothing but a lecture about how she was clearly sending mixed signals. And the mystery woman made him want to thrust both hands directly into the black dirt. Once she flew to Seattle to visit with him over a long weekend and three times he flew to Phoenix, also for long weekend, visits that went spectacularly well.

“Why won’t you kill me?”

Well, folks? What do you think? NYT best-selling stuff? ;)

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And no, this has nothing to do with baseball! ;)

Unless I screwed up dates again (which is entirely possible given the state of my brain lately!), I’m being interviewed at author Caroline Clemmon’s blog. She might have asked me to answer a question y’all don’t actually know the answer to. ;) Anyway, drop by if you have time and say hi. Once you follow the link, you’ll have to go to the left side to the menu bar, and click on BLOG to find me. It’s like a treasure hunt! Only…not. :D

FYI? That video was NOT me yesterday. I’ll have a full synopsis and pictures of the weekend tomorrow! Hope everyone had a terrific weekend.

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If you haven’t seen this video explaining the television show LOST, then you’ve probably been under a rock the past week or so. However, I find it absolutely hysterical and think it makes as much sense as anything else about that show.

And…from the “What were they thinkin’?!?” files, England introduces their 2012 Olympic mascots. They even hired a childrens’ book author to create a story for the…critters(?). I’m not quite sure what to call them, because cuddly they aren’t!

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When you have a bad case of writer’s block, you can always train your hamster:

Or, you can sing about it.

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For the men in my life, none of these apply to you! Never. Well…hardly ever. Erm..not often. Really! See, I was looking for jokes about how wonderful men are and I couldn’t find any. So I’m posting these because you guys have a sense of humor, right? Right?!? (And some of them are nice an very true about y’all at least. Promise!)

For the gals, any of these sound like someone you know?

Men are like…

Men are like…..Laxatives.
They irritate the shit out of you.

Men are like……Bananas.
The older they get, the less firm they are.

Men are like…..Vacations.
They never seem to be long enough.

Men are like…..Bank Machines.
Once they withdraw they lose interest.

Men are like…..Weather.
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.

Men are like…..Blenders.
You need one, but you’re not quite sure why.

Men are like…..Cement.
After getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.

Men are like…..Chocolate Bars.
Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

Men are like…..Coffee
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.

Men are like…..Commercials.
You can’t believe a word they say.

Men are like…..Department Stores.
Their clothes should always be half off.

Men are like…..Government bonds.
They take so long to mature.

Men are like…..Horoscopes.
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

Men are like…..Lawn Mowers.
If you’re not pushing one around, then you’re riding it.

Men are like…..Mascara.
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

Men are like…..Popcorn.
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

Men are like…..Snowstorms.
You never know when he’s coming, how many inches you’ll get or how long he will last

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